En Foco PERISCOPIO URBANO sociedad

Crónica del primer Festival de Calles 2020

Unas 5 mil personas concurrieron al Festival edición protocolo-covid 2020. Entre cervezas y elementos lúdicos, asientos ocupados que se entremezclaban con la necesidad imperiosa de joder después de un año de encierro, el relato de uno de los eventos que más gente convoca en Santa Rosa.

By Noel Parra /

Me sentía pésimamente. Venía de absorber el rigor de la pampeaneidad el martes en Ojo de Agua, llevaba el hígado en la nuca y tenía pocas ganas de salir de mi cueva. Pero es miércoles, carajo. Por fin llegó el Festival de Calles, ¿a quién se le ocurriría faltar? Si esperamos todo el año este momento. Si es miércoles de caravana y hoy el virus no juega, de 20 a 00 horas, ¿por qué tendría que jugar? Apelando a la buena conciencia social, usted sentado por aquí, usted venga acomódese por allí, se pueden meter 5 mil almas caravaneras en pocas calles que no pasa nada, ¿verdad? ¿verdad?

Protocolarmente concurrí. Estaba traicionando el espíritu caravanero del que el año pasado se habló en esta nota, pero no me importó. El profesional equipo periodístico de Revista BIFE había sido citado por los organizadores para realizar una cobertura magistral del evento, y a mí me pareció un buen escenario para beber cerveza de arriba. De modo que acá estamos. En la avenida Alvear, primer punto. Nueve de la noche. Por ahora todos sentados. Cientos de cabezas en la calle frente a las vías. Levantan los brazos y los vuelven a bajar. En el escenario no está el intendente di Nápoli, pero el titular de la Cámara de Comercio, Roberto Nevares, nos regala unas bellas palabras que se olvidan a medida que las pronuncia. Sube un artista y me voy a otro corredor. 

Estoy en la calle Yrigoyen. 400 personas máximo por calle habilitada, según lo que indicaban. Todo ocupado. 9.30 pm. Lo mismo. Gente sentada. Me encuentro con Rodrigo Genoni, del Sindicato de Empleados de Comercio, de brazos cruzados, dice “le calculamos unas 5 mil personas. Es un éxito. Al primero que se chupe y se descontrole, le apagamos la música, pero por ahora va todo tranquilo”.

Sigo por Urquiza, más gente prolijamente sentada. Alguien canta, hay una pasividad insoportable, necesidad de levantarse y joder, igualmente la gente parece disfrutar, sobre todo hay millenials, beben sus primeras cervezas. En el fondo, sobre la av. San Martín, un escenario: dispara con luces de colores.

Avanzo por San Martín. Doblo con intenciones de llegar nuevamente a Alvear. Mi plan es beber desesperadamente, ahogar las penas por no tener absolutamente nada trascendente que anotar, más que mucha gente junta y sentada. Entonces bebo. La cosa se va poniendo más interesante, naturalmente. Minutos antes había ido a las vías. Cargaba una lata de cerveza. Unos pendejos están terriblemente eufóricos. Le dan pitadas al elemento lúdico y tosen como hienas preñadas. Observo que no tienen nada para tomar de modo que apuro mi cerveza, dejando sólo un trago, y camino. Entonces, la frase que esperaba: “e ameo no no convidá un poco de tu birrita, e ameo”. “Sí, cómo no, amigos, tomen”.

Percibía una ligera entonación en la gente sentada, que seguía zamarreando los brazos al viento”

–A ver cómo está eso que están pitando-.

De repente pasa un runner por las vías. Qué clase de psicópata sale a correr a esta hora con un virus dando vueltas, por Dios. Me voy a comprar otra cerveza al kiosco. Percibía una ligera entonación en la gente sentada, que seguía zamarreando los brazos al viento. El kiosquero cuenta un puterío. Lo escucho con atención. Querían cortar la calle justo donde estaba su local, y le pidieron que no venda latas porque “tienen que vender los bares del Festival de Calles”. Los sacó de largo, según él. El hombre estaba bien preparado, lleno de vasos para volcar las botellas de birra. Pero el ambiente, este 2020, es más tenue. Fue un año duro, estamos mansos, tenemos el ala caída, veo expresiones de gorriones golpeados con intenciones de despegar nuevamente.

Les cuento mi historia personal, de principio a fin, y me derivan con el que agenda a los “trabajadores de prensa”. “¿A los qué?”, pregunto. Me señalan y voy. El muchacho me pregunta: “¿Vos sos periodista?”

Me cuenta que el año pasado fue más fructífero porque ahora, al estar sentada, la gente no concurre a los locales aledaños. Compro otra lata pero no vuelvo con las hienas de las vías, tengo su tuca y cerveza industrial. Unos patovas me dicen “y a vos quién te conoce”. Les cuento mi historia personal, de principio a fin, y me derivan con el que agenda a los “trabajadores de prensa”. “¿A los qué?”, pregunto. Me señalan y voy. El muchacho me pregunta: “¿Vos sos periodista?”

–Sí, ¿acaso no ves la cara de busca y que llevo puesta una camisa manga corta blanca gastada?

Saca una calcomanía y la quiere pegar en mi herramienta de trabajo. Qué hacés, le digo, no te gusta el amarillo, concluye. Me dice que es del Sindicado de Empleados de Comercio. Se baja el barbijo y me muestra su bigote. Yo le muestro el mío. Me mira con su bigote de leche y anota mi nombre. Noel Parra, pone. Le digo que ponga Revista BIFE en negrita y cursiva. De paso, fisgoneo qué medios estuvieron presentes. Cuántos colegas que vinieron para ver si podían mangar una birra -me digo llevándome la mano a la frente-, espero que hayan podido, colegas, porque yo confié inútilmente que Nevares iba a tener un gesto para con los laburantes, pero no hay caso, es duro como el roble. Sigo mi camino y encuentro a unas amistades. Me siento.

De paso, fisgoneo qué medios estuvieron presentes. Cuántos colegas que vinieron para ver si podían mangar una birra

Observo: gente más enfiestada. Algunos ya parados, bailando. Largas colas en los baños. Pedimos dos promos más cerveza artesanal. Una de las muchachas tiene un Centro de Estética, desde donde libra una batalla contra el tiempo. Desarrolla sobre la necesidad de pulir la belleza externa pero también la interna, “van de la mano”. Detrás, una joven radicalmente enfiestada perrea, perrea, perrea. “Eh, abandónico gato”, le dice a uno que pasa con cara de naipe, haciéndose el distraído. Está por concluir el Festival, apuramos cuatro pintas más. Por mi parte, recuerdo lo que se dijo el año pasado sobre las secuencias de los Festivales:

“Para el primer miércoles hubo una modesta difusión y concurrimos a la calle Yrigoyen como ese perro medio desconfiado que con las orejas gachas y moviendo la cola te observa de lejos mientras uno le ofrece mimos. Para el segundo, recibimos el mimo y respondimos con unas 4.500 personas hasta la 1 de la mañana. Ya para el tercer y último festín, el virus de la caravana se había esparcido, el acontecimiento ya estaba consolidado: un aluvión zoológico en el centro de la ciudad”.

Y me pregunto cómo será el próximo miércoles 16, cuando se repita, si es que la situación sanitaria lo permite.

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